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cuntstand:

hate:

is that fred

i think that’s lucas

cuntstand:

hate:

is that fred

i think that’s lucas

(Source: youtubelifeforever, via parkingstrange)

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tsarbucks:

no i’m not gonna lend you my pencil because if i lend you my pencil then you’ll want my calculator and then you’ll want austria and czechoslovakia and then you’ll end up invading poland and i will not have that shit

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

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happiest:

its such a mind fuck when you read song lyrics and you’re like “oh it says that” 

(via communistbakery)

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thewearysavantponders:

purple skeleton going the extra mile.

thewearysavantponders:

purple skeleton going the extra mile.

(Source: ragdollvera, via yousoldtheworld)

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ethiopienne:

instead of counting sheep at night, count the number of times you can repeat “my life is dope and i do dope shit” before drifting into dreams full of kanye level self-confidence

(via africandad)

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Going back to school in September

jayma-jones:

Teacher - did you do anything nice during Summer?

Me - oh yeah, I went to L.A, New York, Miami and did a bunch of photoshootsimage

(via pr1ncesssssss)

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necromancer:

necromancer:

necromancer:

I just broke Skyrim by trying to spawn 20,000 cabbages

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they’re just floating here as the game crashes, hailing the start of the apocalypse

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I

AM

CABBAGEBORN

(via the-perks-0f-being-a-cactus)

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catesstrophe:

today a dude slammed my finger on accident because he was closing a metal drawer i had my fingers in and i was on drive through and i literally screamed into the headset and the lady just kept ordering her drink as i was trying to hush down three different LOUD MEN SAYING “OH MY GOD WHAT DID HE DO TO YOUR HAND”

she just kept going 

i screamed into a headset and she just kept going

(via pawnee-parks-and-rec)